Weep No More, My Lady Oscar
by prettydynamic
Summary: A short glimpse of what might have transpired while Oscar was growing up. I added a chapter 2 for a romantic ending to the flashback.
1. Chapter 1

She wondered why her older sisters were given pretty dolls with yellow dresses and Ballerina Barbie dolls in pink tutus, while she was given toy guns and swords. She stared enviously at her 3 elder sisters playing make-believe with their dolls at the receiving room. A lone doll in Tropical Hawaiian clothes lay by the feet of her sister Lucille. Her sister doesn't seem to like it. It was shoved on the side without being given much attention. She wanted to ask her if she could have the doll. She would call her Amaya. How she would love to comb her long dark hair and put pretty flowers on its hair but she was afraid this would displease her father.

She remembered dancing in front of a mirror. Twirling around and lifting her heels while her hands were over her head imitating her sisters during their dance classes. Her father caught her and scolded her. He said she shouldn't be preoccupied with silly things like her sisters. He told her to grow up fast that he may bring her hunting with him. But Oscar didn't want to go hunting. She didn't like the idea of carrying a gun and shooting a helpless little fox or a cute little fawn. All she wanted was one little doll she could call her own. One little doll she can play make-believe with. A little doll she can pretend to be her... to be free to dance ballet...free to put frilly dresses in bright colours and ruffles.

She immediately wiped the tear that slid down her face as she saw her sister discarded the Hawaiian Barbie. Her father told her never to cry, that she must be tough and hold in her emotions. You could have asked her for the doll. Lucille will gladly give it toy you, she scolded herself. She ran up the second floor in frustration. Just get your water gun and play outside, she thought. But on the way she heard giggling in her oldest sister's room. She quietly opened the door and peeped in. She found her putting some colourful stuff on her second eldest sister's face. She watched them in awe as she saw her other sister transform into a beautiful princess-her lips were cherry red, her eyes were bright with different hues of blue-it was fascinating.

"How come when you put it on me it looks so much better than when I do it myself," complained her second sister pouting but nevertheless pleased and happy with the way she looked on the mirror.

"Margaret, have you tried on the peach dress I gave you. It is my favourite dress. You can wear it on your friend's birthday party," said her oldest sister to her third sister who was busy brushing her hair till it shone like gold. She looked at her own pixie cut hair. There's nothing much of it to brush. I too have golden blond hair like Margaret's. I want to put ribbons on it too and brush it till it shines as bright as the sun. She watched Margaret try on the dress. It fits perfectly. I know I would look nice in that peach dress too, she thought. Why can't I have my older sisters' dresses? Because you're too small and they're too big, she scolded herself. Maybe I can use some of Lucille's or Michelle's, they're not much bigger. Yeah and have your father raving mad, she thought.

She ran out the garden to play alone by the fountain. None of her sisters would be playing with toy guns anyway. She sat by the fountain and threw her gun on the ground in frustration. I want a doll, she thought and burst into tears.

"Don't cry Oscar. Come here, I'll fix your gun." Oscar looked up and found Andre standing beside her near the fountain. He thought the broken toy gun upset her but truth be told, she was pleased it was destroyed.

"I don't want to play with it," said Oscar in a small voice. Andre looked at her, as though trying to decipher what was going on in her head.

"Alright then...I'll get your sword..."

"But I have no one to play with," protested she.

"You can play with me. We will sword fight. You'll be King Arthur and I'll be Lancelot Dulac," he suggested with a big smile.

Oscar returned his grin. "Really? Would you play with me?"

"Of course. Come on let's get your little pony and I can teach you how to ride before we play sword," said Andre.

Oscar was thrilled and from then on not playing with dolls wasn't so bad after all. He enjoyed playing war games with Andre using her water gun. They play with her pellet guns too, shooting cans on the hillside whenever they take a hike by the stream. She likes their sword fights too. Her father was very pleased to see her playing with Andre. He told her that next year on her seventh birthday, she will start having her fencing lessons. She was excited! She wanted to beat Andre in their sword fights. So far Andre would always win or he would let her win whenever she's had enough of losing for one day. Someday I'll be as strong as you are Andre or even stronger, she mused with delight as she looked at her friend. It wasn't so bad being a boy. It was fun playing with Andre.

She enjoyed his company. She used to hate climbing up trees and running up the hills the way boys do. Whenever she sees her male schoolmates doing so she thought it was stupid making themselves all sweaty climbing up and running. It's better to read poetry and sing in Italian or any foreign song like her sisters. At least her father allowed her to have that music education like her sisters and she feels proud that she can play the violin and piano as good as they and her voice was more beautiful than any of them. That's what their teacher told her and it gave gave a sense of accomplishment. She was happy to do something she likes that pleased her father. He loved listening to her play the piano and sing.

But having Andre with her gave her enjoyment in activities she used to loath. She suddenly found them fun and exciting. She couldn't imagine a day without her bestfriend Andre. Her father was totally pleased seeing them play sword in the garden. He felt equally delighted when he saw Andre teaching her some self defense against bad guys, and his fist-fights were amusing to her father. He heard him tell Andre to help her be a brave boy.

One day as they sat by the stream in the mountain Andre noticed that Oscar was deep in thought. "What's the matter, Oscar? Come on I'll give you this chance to shoot me with water. I will not hit you back," said Andre with a grin.

"Nothing's the matter. I was just remembering the story nanny told me before I slept the other night. It was a story of a princess named Olivia."

She then turned to Oscar and asked earnestly. "Andre do you think Olivia is pretty name?"

"Uhm.. well, yeah," he answered uncertainly.

"Why do you think father didn't name me Olivia and why didn't he named me Francesca after my grandmother? I don't like my name... it's ugly. I think it's a boy's name," she confided to her friend.

"Oscar happens to be a beautiful name. I like Oscar and I think it's beautiful," Andre said.

His response delighted Oscar. "Really? Wow!" replied Oscar with a big smile.

"Besides, it's unique to have a boy's name...makes you extra cool," reassured Andre.

This seemed to excite and pacify Oscar at the same time. "You really think so?"

"Of course! I love the name Oscar Francois," reassured Andre.

"Come on Andre let's play water fight. Promise you will let me win today, okay."

On her seventh birthday she met her new fencing instructor who would start giving her lessons every Tuesday and Thursday. As a gift, her father bought her a new pony. It was black. She didn't like it. It looked fearsome. She still preferred her white horse Swiftwind but an additional pony meant Andre can use the other and this made her happy. They can start riding together. The other horses were far too big for Andre as they were her father's horses. She felt sorry for him whenever he would take her and her pony out for a ride. He was on foot leading them.

"Pssttt... Oscar...I have something for you," whispered Andre from behind the ballroom door. He was waving at her to come out and follow him. She looked around and found everyone busy with their own business. Her birthday party was a huge success. She immediately ran out to follow Andre. She ran after him but he was ahead of her by a long shot. She still couldn't outrun him. Maybe she would eventually...

She thought he went inside the little cottage he shares with his grandmother inside the Jarjeyes Mansion grounds. "Andre!" she called.

She found him inside his bedroom with a big smile on his face. "I have a present for you...it took me months to refurbish it...I hope you will like it... It's not brand new and it's not as expensive as the ones we see on shops on the mainstreet...but what the heck..."

He opened his closet and there inside was huge doll house.

"It was my mother's. My grandmother kept it. I know you want to play with dolls but you were forbidden and so I fixed this and added a few more furniture inside. Look..."

Andre demonstrated that the house can be opened in the middle and inside were rooms of the house with furniture and a little doll with blond hair was seated on the rocking chair.

Oscar's eyes were as round as a saucer. Never had she possessed anything so magnificent. My sisters would love to play with this...her big smile suddenly vanished. "I can't play with it. My father will be mad."

"You can play with it here, in my room. He wouldn't know. And besides, if we close the house. It would look like an ordinary wooden house painted by a little boy. He wouldn't know there's a doll inside. You can play make believe now. Here, I saved my money so I can buy him..."

He showed her another small figure. It was a boy with black hair.

"I bought him so the little girl doll won't be lonely. Now they can eat together, play together, and they can sleep together," smiled Oscar.

The doll house had three floors. There was a living room, a kitchen, a study, a dining hall, 2 bedrooms, and a bathroom with a tub. Oscar was delighted. She took the little boy doll from Andre and placed him on the chair beside the little girl doll on the rocking chair.

"This is the best gift ever..." she grinned at bhim.

* * *

Oscar touched the dusty 2 small figures in the doll house. It had been ages since she played with them. Has it really been twenty years since then? She grew up too fast, too soon being assigned in the Royal Army at fifteen. She remembered playing with the dollhouse everyday for the next two years after her seventh birthday, then it became twice a week on the next year, and then twice a month when she turned 12.

Then when she was thirteen she had to practice harder to be qualified to be in the Royal Army, to be a skilful and competent soldier that she had an only managed to see her doll house once in a blue moon. The day she became a soldier she moved the dollhouse to her own room. She knew her father wouldn't be invading her privacy now that she has grown up. She wanted to keep it as a memento of happy childhood and a special gift from her best friend.

As a child, she would have forgotten she was a girl had it not been for Andre, and when she became an army soldier at 15, she thought she was saying goodbye permanently to her womanhood but the dollhouse in her closet was a reminder that despite her unusual job for a lady, despite her skilful swordsmanship and her masculine army uniform she was still a girl.

She dusted off the two small figures and had them stand together in the living room of the dollhouse like two individuals in an embrace. Oh Andre, all these years you have been my armoury, she thought. You were my big brother, my confidante, my best friend. I was blind not to notice when your friendship and brotherly concern turned to something more. Perhaps I have become too much of a tough army soldier, oblivious to anything else but my responsibilty and my reputation as a great and efficient soldier.

I love you too, Andre. Not as a friend, not as a brother... Looking back I must have loved you too back then with a special adoration of a little girl but I was learning and adjusting to be a man...

A tear slid down her cheek. I'm sorry father. I must disobey you. I cannot marry Girodere. I have done nothing but try to please you all these years. I hope you understand that now I must follow my heart.

* * *

Prettydynamic says: I'm not sure if I should add to this to make the story more elaborate or keep it as is. The ending may be just that...Oscar realizing how much she loved Andre...


	2. Chapter 2

prettydynamic says: Well, I just thought to add a romantic ending to this story instead of leaving it open ended. I hope you like the chapter that I added. Please let me know what you think.

* * *

It was her father's 65th birthday. The Jarheyes Mansion was filled with merriment and cheer as another glorious year had been added to the patriarch of the family Jarjeyes. His military constituents headed by his best friend General Bouille were among the honoured guests in this special night of festivities. Fellow nobles paid their respects as they enjoy the night of endless champagne and bountiful meal.

General de Jarjeyes eyed his daughter from among their guests. He wondered if this was the right time to announce her engagement to Count Girodere. He was amazed at his daughter's astounding beauty. Although dressed in his respectable army uniform, she was a natural beauty. General de Jarjeyes furrowed his brows as he realized there was something different about his daughter. She had an unusual 'glow' in her, an unusual feminine laugh and charming smile as she replied to something one of her sisters whispered to her. She was generally straight and serious in her disposition when wearing her army uniform, giving it the reverence the wearer requires.

Since when had the subtle change in his daughter occurred? Had he been so busy he never noticed. His reverie was cut by the clanking of the wine glasses. He smiled in response to the guests cheer and teasing to give his beautiful wife a kiss. More cheer and laughter erupted as he gave his wife a sound kiss on the lips.

Girodere bowed before him and presented a blue box. As General de Jarjeyes opened the lid before the eyes of all the guests, Girodere spoke, "Please accept my medal of valour, given to me by the King of France. With all due respect, I would like to give this medal of honour as a birthday present to my future father-in-law."

Everyone gasped in surprise for a brief moment, and turned to one another in whispers of confusion before their surprise turned to joy and excitement as they all burst into applause. General de Jarjeyes' announcement dispersed any further confusion.

"I am pleased to announce that I, General Ranier de Jarjeyes , give my youngest daughter's hand, Oscar Francois to this fine soldier Count Victor Clement Girodere whom he sought to marry on the next quarter."

Girodere stood up from his genuflection and smiled broadly as he offered a toast of his red wine to the guests cheering gaily to General de Jarjeyes' announcement.

"Thank you, general. I am the luckiest and the happiest man in all of France tonight."

The smile from Oscar's face at her sister's great news about her pregnancy vanished as the realization of her father's words set in. It took a moment or two before Oscar absorbed his father's words. Her attention was divided between her sister and his father's loud voice from the center of the ballroom.

A mixture of emotion overcame Oscar. She felt furious about the sudden announcement, putting her and Girodere on the spot when she had told her father they both needed to discuss this matter again before he should give his blessing to Girodere. Oscar planned to tell her father about his feelings for Andre which is why she couldn't marry Girodere. _Oh father, what have you done? _At the moment she felt like crying too. She was torn of being true to herself, and agreeing to this marriage to save her father and Girodere from embarrassment. She confused. She was angry. She wanted to throw everything within her arm's reach. _Oh Andre..._

She immediately searched the room for his outstanding presence. Though he was treated like a family, etiquette dictated being a servant he must not join the nobility in such gatherings. She knew he was somewhere, hovering or listening, watching from a corner as he pretended to help the hired waiters for the event.

Oscar never had a hard time finding him among crowds of people. Although his height was a common six feet, and his clothes lack the finery of expensive tailoring found in those of the nobles, he carried himself with great pride and honour, and his majestic presence and handsome profile was eye-catching that you cannot miss him.

Andre was standing beside the chef slicing the roast beef. He asked the chef if he could try his hand in slicing thin strips of the meat without destroying its aesthetic value. He took the large carving knife from the chef and before he could delve his knife on the roast, he heard the announcement loud and clear. He suddenly felt all numb as everything around him became a blur, all he could hear repeatedly playing in his head was General de Jarjeyes saying Oscar was marrying Girodere.

Hot angry tears began clouding his eyes. Oscar found him and it broke her heart to read the pain, the sadness, and the anger in his eyes. All she wanted was to ease his pain and kiss his sorrow away the way he always did whenever she was down or hurt all these years. Andre wasn't even aware that he still held the knife in his hand that for a moment Oscar was afraid that his rage and pain may cloud his judgement which would lead him to cause havoc in the middle of the ballroom. But Andre was still a gentleman. He dropped the carving knife and without looking back, ran outside the ballroom into cold September night.

Oscar was suddenly blinded by tears. She couldn't let Andre go, she just couldn't. She suddenly found her voice and amidst the merriment and congratulations, she looked from her father to Girodere, to her Commander General Bouille and to her family with tears brimming in her eyes as she spoke, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry father. Forgive me Girodere... I cannot marry you."

Oscar genuflected, took her sword, the symbol of her high rank in the French Army and offered it back to Genereal Bouille and her father. She bowed as she held out her sword. "I'm sorry that I must disobey. I cannot marry Girodere as I am in love with another man, a commoner, and if because of this I am disowned by my family and found unfit to wear the French Army uniform by the nobility, I am resigning my post as Colonel and head of the Company B."

She stared back at the faces of disbelief surrounding. "I'm sorry...perhaps someday you can forgive me" she uttered once again, still in tears, before putting the sword down at their feet and running out into the night to follow Andre.

Andre jumped on his horse ferociously, heading off in great speed into the night. His tears melted with the wind that blew on his face and hair as he sped as far away as possible from the Jarjeyes Mansion. He had always feared this day, the day where Oscar would be marrying another man. It was one thing to love her without her loving him back but it was another if she becomes someone else's wife. It would completely eradicate his very little chance of hoping she would someday return his feelings. And to his chagrin, he found it improper to quietly love another man's wife.

He increased the speed of his horse, hoping the strong night winds would ebb his pain and sorrow. He couldn't bear to see Oscar in the arms of another. He would never go back...

In his misery, he thought he was hallucinating hearing Oscar's voice calling out his name.

"Andre! Andre!" it called urgently.

He urged the horse faster, hoping his hallucination would disperse.

"Andre! Andre!" it cried urgently.

The voice sounded so sorrowful and desperate that he stopped his horse and turned it back. In the midst of the night a willowy figure on a white horse gradually came into view. He had to blink several times just to ensure it was Oscar approaching. He didn't want to hear her explanation, didn't want her to know the effect the news of her marriage had on him. _Leave me alone Oscar. I cannot bear to see you anymore..._

He turned his horse away from Oscar and urged it once again to gallop fast and wildly away from Jarjeyes Mansion.

As Oscar came out of from the mansion into the courtyard she frantically glanced left and right in search of Andre but he was nowhere in sight. Panic seized her. She couldn't let him go without telling him she loved him. The thundering gallop and loud neigh of Andre's horse pierced the dark night. Oscar immediately grabbed the reigns of the first horse in sight as she realized that Andre ran out in his horse.

She always believed she was a better horse rider than he was and she would catch up with him in no time. But fifteen minutes passed and she still couldn't reach him. She could see his silhouette but he was riding too fast for her to catch up. She called out his name several times but did not seem to elicit any response. She was getting desperate. Please let him hear me, she prayed. And as though the heavens heard her prayer, she saw him stop and looked back at her. She called out his name once again just reinforce her presence but to her dismay just when she was quite near and Andre surely saw her, Andre turned back his horse, deliberately ignoring her and doubly increasing the speed of his horse.

Oscar felt angry. _Oh wait till I get my hands on him. How dare he ignore me. _She was upset. Andre had never ignored her before. She felt likewise worried and perplexed. She was getting quite tired running after him. Gathering up all her strength, she urged the horse to gallop faster in order to minimize her distance to Andre and when she was sure she was close enough to jump on him, she purposefully leaped from her horse and onto Andre, causing them to topple and roll savagely on the ground.

Andre's first instinct was to protect Oscar. He gathered her in his arms and protectively shield her with his body to minimize any potential injury she might incur from their fall and rough roll on the ground.

They landed with her on top of him as his arms still lay protectively around her. Their eyes met and for the first time Oscar moved her eyes away to hide her unsettling and turbulent emotions. She wasn't sure yet how to handle her feelings for Andre.

"I'm fine. You can let me go now," she said in soft voice.

Andre furrowed his brows and pushed Oscar away from him, causing her to topple beside him.

"What was that for?" she said indignantly.

"For following me in the middle of the night and causing me to worry about you because of our not so graceful fall," said Andre indifferently as he stood up, wiping the dirt from his shoulders and pants.

Oscar stood up indignantly and pushed Andre, causing him to lose his balance and fall back into the ground.

"Hey," he cried.

"That was for making me worry about you running out into the night and making me run after you for several miles I thought I would die of exhaustion," she scolded, looking down on him.

"I didn't ask you to go running after me. You can go back to your fiancé..." he yelled.

"Oh yeah! Maybe I should!" she yelled back, turning his back from him and starting to walk away.

She hadn't but made but two steps when Andre over threw her from behind. They both landed on the ground with Andre on top of her. He had her pinned on the ground. She was suddenly aware how intimately he was pressed against her, reminding her of the day he was jealous of Fersen which caused him to kiss her rather savagely. She looked deeply into his beautiful green eyes and her lips parted in their own accord, inviting him to kiss her.

Andre felt her acquiescence to his touch and saw the hungry look in her eyes which encouraged him to go further. Slowly his lips descended gently on hers as his hands began to fumble on the buttons of her army uniform. Oscar ran her fingers through his jet black her, pressing him closer to her. Andre needed no further encouragement as he made her his on the forest ground beneath the moonlight.

Oscar sighed contentedly in Andre's arms as she rested her head on his chest, his body keeping her warm from the chilly winds of the September night. She couldn't believe that what they have just shared was even more magical and glorious than how her sisters described it to her. She could lie like this forever in Andre's arms. Then she remembered, she hadn't told him yet how she felt but a sudden feeling of coyness overcame her. _Will he spurn my love? How do I tell him?_

He gently kissed her head as he held her tightly to him. "I don't know if I should apologize for ruining you for your fiancé... but I am not sorry, Oscar. I love you...I always have and I'll be damned if I let someone else take you as his wife."

"Andre..." she started quite nervously.

Andre kissed her on the forehead. "Yes, my darling Oscar?" he smiled.

"I'm not going back. I want to stay with you..." she said.

Andre helped her dress back into her uniform with utmost gentleness, bathing her skin with kisses as he buttoned back her army uniform. He stared into her eyes passionately.

"After what happened, I don't think I can take you back even if you beg me...I love you Oscar Francois and I want you to be my wife."

Oscar smiled at him, wrapping her arms around his neck as she replied, "I love you Andre Grandier and I want to be your wife...I'll go with you wherever you go."

With those words Oscar kissed him fervently with all the love she felt for him.


End file.
